Actually, things are better here too. Dh has had major health issues hanging over him and though far from through them, he did get better news than expected at the cardiologist yesterday. Tomorrow go back for a stress test which will determine whether or not they will clear him for back surgery. His back is so bad, he basically is not able to do anything. Tries to walk just a little with a walker, if he leans forward to take some pressure off his back, he can get around some but to try to just walk wipes him out. He is not one to talk about things but could tell he was concerned about this, thinking he was probably facing heart surgery before anything could be considered for the back. He had been making comments about not being around long and talking wills. I am very grateful that we both retired with retirement funds that would allow us to make it even if we lost the other one, never high salaries, not huge pensions but having one at all anymore is getting rare.
My husband and I had a heart to heart about a major marital issue yesterday. Things could have gone one way or the other. It was a long overdue conversation; fortunately, it went well, but it was a difficult conversation that’s been more troublesome to one of us than to the other. We are also working much better together on the budget since we’ve been using the very basic pen and paper one I’d mentioned recently that we’re now using. The one basic budget is for his businesses (his own bootfitting business and then for his independent contractor’s job) and the other is for our home budget (financed by my income and his income working at the ski shop). We’ve been robbing Peter (home) to pay Paul (business). Jim didn’t realize (or want to acknowledge) what a drag the business end can be at times, and a couple of things desperately needed to be addressed. Amazingly, since things are now in black and white he can’t ignore what it costs to run our home, take care of our family and our future needs, pay for his supplies, and look at what his actual travel expenses are. We realized this past week it looks as if the business is up a couple of thousand dollars for the month from where it had been last month. It should be even better next month. It was simply a matter of dh knowing where we actually stood financially in a way that he understood. He realized this month he was limited in going on the road (for his independent contractors job) or in buying extra supplies (for his own business) because the funds weren’t there to cover everything and also have something to contribute to our family. Before, I’d take money from the home to float the business but this month I told him it wasn’t happening unless there was actual money in his business account to cover his travels. He agreed. He now sees the numbers each Friday, and he “gets” it. He’s now working not only harder, but smarter, and even he admits to having an ephinany of sorts. He’s found ways to make more money over the past couple of weeks. It’s rather exciting, to be honest. This isn’t what our major marital problem has been, but it’s been one of those things that hasn’t helped matters. All in all, it seems as if we’re on the right track to make our lives better and our marriage stronger than ever. I hope all is the same for you, Kathryn. I think the fact that you and Steve are now commingling your funds is a huge step in your marriage. When you wrote that the two of you had come to this decision I was very happy to read this. I realize what a huge step this is in your marriage. I think very highly of you, and pray for only the best for you, your marriage and your future.
in your relationship, I am certain that doing DR was a huge contributing factor to the change, just as having financial chaos will stress relationships tpo the breaking point. I can’t believe how much different ALL my relationships are now, because I am on a much more serene level, I am more relaxed and able to be PRESENT in the moment, not fighting anxiety and fear constantly.
DH and I have been in marriage counseling now for 18 months. Started when we were at our darkest moments financially (and a bunch of other things were going south about that time as well). We were fighting a lot, feeling very isolated from each other, losing faith in each other as partners, and feeling like we needed to get our own things done because that other person wasn’t going to be very helpful or supportive. We started 2012 not sure what the future held and still not quite on track with each other. Fast forward to now, and our relationship is completely different. We’ve started 2013 with a much better outlook, a much stronger relationship and a definitely restored sense that “we’re in it together”. Now we’re working to make it better, rather than merely just trying to hang on for the ride. Just this last week we’ve made some important relationship breakthroughs, which I won’t get into because they are subtle and would take a few novels of explanation. Suffice to say that despite a VERY tight budget, we’re doing better than ever and moving into the year with a healthy mix of caution and optimism. I’ve never been here before. I think I could get used to this. Of course I’d rather have jumped all the way to BS7 (when is that rich South African uncle going to be sending the $$$$????) but this is the best we’ve been yet. I also hope and trust that there are others out there who are “moving in the direction of goodness.” If folks have been mulling whether things can be better with their spouses, my reply would be a very emphatic YES! Sometimes folks need a “trail guide” to get there, but yes it’s possible.
but I may have overdosed on Pollyanna pills because ever since the first of the year I have been feeling VERY optimistic about 2013. I have this overall gut feeling that it is going to be a wonderful year. I’ve been kind of afraid to say anything about it for fear of jinxing it. But it seems like I get up each day in an even brighter mood than the day before.I don’t know if it’s because the guys have been pitching in so much to help me declutter the house, or the fact we are finally truly snowballing at a decent rate (even with the flip-flop budget setback), the fact I get to stay home and not suffer physically from all the work of merchandising (we really are looking better financially since I cut back so much), the fact that in December this year dh and I both will be able to sign up for our ss checks (then watch that gazelle run), the planning –finally—of the much awaited Walt Disney World trip, or what. But I am on a Pollyanna high and I want everyone to catch the same fever I have. I want everyone to look around today and find a Millie Moment to share. Jan where the sun is shining on this bright last day of January 2013 in OK
not a project card and they didn’t close the account I did when we started DR. The thing I found weird was it said zero per last statement on the website, but there was no statement. Oh well, I still can access it online and look at the zero balance if I need a boost. LOL! Jan who is simply thrilled the account is paid off and gone forever in OK
if it has anything to do with them terminating the credit card, or at least the project card.Lowes had a normal credit card where you could charge anything and they had a project card that you had to spend a certain amount to use.We paid ours off and closed it, haven’t gotten any statements in awhile. But they sent something a month or so ago saying if you have an open project you can keep it and you have til the end of Jan I think to charge more items. If you window is closed you can not open any more windows. DH read it so there maybe have been more to it. But Im not sure if they are closing just the project card or both forms of their card.
That is a major bummer though I get a thrill of seeing all those zeros when we pay things off too.
the first thing to do is look at the upcoming budget and see what you can redo and maybe fit in this extra expense. The other option is to go to the BEF and take out the 103.76, put the snowball (detroitharmonie.com payday loans for bad credit) on hold til it replenishes, and move on from there.
But on the brightside of this, you’re aware of what needs to be done and it needs to be handled. You have a plan in place that allows for things to happen without the significant impact that it used to be.
My hubby and I started FPU classes at our church in January and finished in April. I don’t want to share our numbers with people that I go to church with, so I came here, where you all understand and won’t judge. We’re still stuggling with our budget. I was hoping someone would look over the figures we have to work with and give me some ideas on what you would do to get this thing working. I’ve tried everything I can think of. Sometimes when another person looks at the figures they see something different. I want to get these bill turned around, so they’re on time and the phone quits ringing.
We bring home $2900 per month
Water $40 (behind $40)
Cell Phone $120 (starting in July this will be $70)
Groceries $500 (5 people/3 teens)
Car Payment $226 (behind $226)
Truck Payment $280 (behind $280)
Car Insurance $130 (4 drivers) (starting in July this will be $75)
Car Fuel $400 (starting in July this will be less)
Visa 1 $140 (can’t change or be late – turned over to court for payment)
Home Depot $40
Visa 2 $250
Visa 3 $30
BP Gas Card $20
Sunoco Gas Card $20 (behind $80)
GE Moneybank $40
Hospital Bill $25
Hospital Bill $1800 due by 6/1 or will go to court
Medical equipment needed $800 (for hubby sleep apnea)
Graduation Party for twins
Driving lessons for 16 year old
Tires for the car
I just went to the Lowe’s website to print out a copy of the “paid in full” statement from where we paid them off in December. The statement had been due to cut off on January 13, 2013 so I wanted the joy of printing out the zero balance statement for my records. Only despite the website saying the last statement has me at a zero balance it shows no statement online past the Dec 13, 2013. Hmm, bummer I really wanted to see that zero statement. But instead I printed a copy of the page showing it said we have a zero balance AND the payment history page as well. Just in case there is ever any question in the future. At least both of those say we owe zero to them.Once that was done I cleared that bookmarked website from my favorites list—Now that was fun! Jan who thinks they could have at least posted one final statement online in OK
I have installed Every Dollar and am looking at our finances differently.
I have come to the realization that I have an addiction to spending money. I have to consciously think about each and every purchase I make and make sure that it is moving our finances, our life, and our dreams in the right direction.
There is still money in our bank account! I have cut back significantly in our grocery budget. From $1000 a month to under $700!
The plan is that after Thanksgiving, I will transfer $350 to savings to add to the Christmas budget.
I have been working on my marriage, my attitude and demeanor using the Love Dare series. I am walking with God and using a devotion Bible to help me focus and study.
I feel calmer and more in control.